Christmas Just Isn’t the Same

I’ve always loved Christmas. I enjoy decorating and cooking, going to the Christmas Eve services, waking up Christmas morning early so we can eat, open presents, and visit. I’ve always enjoyed listening to Christmas music, too. Being in a new place and being there without Bryan, however, has forced me to change a few things.... Continue Reading →

The First Thanksgiving

For the last couple of weeks, I’ve been working during the day, making mental plans of what I’m going to accomplish once I get home. Then I come home at night mentally exhausted and unable to do much of anything that requires active brain function. Which is why I'm here at home on a Wednesday... Continue Reading →

Thin Places

All Soul’s Day is a tradition I didn’t have much experience with prior to becoming an Episcopalian. Baptists have a hard enough time dealing with Halloween, much less with a holiday that involved praying for the souls of the dead. But in the middle of one of the most exciting sporting events in Memphis history,... Continue Reading →

Telling the Hairdresser Your Husband Died

In the intangible book of widowhood, they left out a chapter. It’s the chapter on telling your hairdresser your husband died. As women, hairdressers are our confidants. We talk to them about our day, our love lives, our kids, and anything else we can cram into that blissful time of being pampered. We were chatting... Continue Reading →

Re-Visiting the Hospital

I went to visit a friend in the hospital today. It was the first time I had been in that hospital since Bryan died. I wasn’t sure how that was going to turn out. Would I stop at the door and run screaming in the other direction? Would I even make it into the parking... Continue Reading →

I Hit A Brick Wall

I hit THE WALL today. via GIPHY   I didn’t even know that was a thing. I’m trucking along, trying to find balance, trying to stay busy, trying to keep my sanity, when all of a sudden, WHAM. I run smack-dab into the most solid, mental wall I’ve ever encountered. I Googled grief and brick... Continue Reading →

Grief Turns You Stupid

I’m rarely at a loss for words even though I enjoy comfortable silences with people close to me. I can talk about most anything and I enjoy talking. I love hearing people’s thoughts on most everything and sharing my own opinions – on sports, politics, religion, and good movies. All of that stopped about a... Continue Reading →

Praying for the Dead

I grew up Southern Baptist where we didn't typically pray for the dead. We prayed for the sick and we would pray for the people left behind after death, but prayers for the dead just didn't happen. It was as if they had played the cosmic game of Pac-Man and once they got eaten by... Continue Reading →

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