It’s been a while since I’ve blogged about my grief journey. It’s been six years and three months since Bryan has been gone. It feels as if that were another life, another version of me. It’s been a while since I’ve just sat quietly, thinking about him. I miss him. He made my life beautiful... Continue Reading →
Hello, Grief, My Old Friend
You would think that after 3-1/2 years of living in the condo that I would have finally gotten all the little miscellaneous Bryan things sorted. I was going through my buffet, pulling out Halloween party things to properly pack away in my Halloween bins and came across two golfing gift cards that had been given... Continue Reading →
The Quiet Moments
I found this graphic today from @hopeforwidows on Instagram and it really has grabbed me. It’s been four years and four months as of July 7th of this year. It feels as if it’s been forever, but at the same time, it feels as though it just happened. As always, I use this blog to... Continue Reading →
Frozen in Time
This was the last photo ever taken of me and Bryan together before he went into the hospital for the last time. It was taken on December 24th, 2018, the Christmas Eve service at Saint John’s Episcopal. That night has been a bit lost in the haze of old memories. If I had to guess,... Continue Reading →
Weird Widow Milestones
I crossed a bit of a milestone last month. June 7th marked the day that Bryan will have been gone for the same amount of time that I was with him when he was alive. It’s a weird milestone. I’m not even sure how healthy it was to have even acknowledged that date, but that's... Continue Reading →
The Smell of Fall
Fall has a smell. I smell it every year and every year I struggle to describe it. Saturday mornings are cool with just a bit of a chill in the air. The air smells clean and smells like change. Sometimes if I’m quiet and still, I can almost put the right words to it. Fall... Continue Reading →
Weekend at Bernie’s
Lazy Saturday mornings are the best. I can fix pancakes without having to wolf it down and dashing out the door for work. I can drink mimosas without guilt because drinking champagne during the work day is frowned upon in the U.S. I throw some strawberries in there so technically, a mimosa is a vehicle... Continue Reading →
Why I Wear a Mask
When Bryan was fitted with the transfer set as part of the peritoneal dialysis process, we would both wear a blue mask and wash our hands (I sang happy birthday twice - every time) before attempting to clean the transfer set and/or open it for the dialysis bag hookup and detachment. We did this EVERY.... Continue Reading →
The Gap Closes Quickly
I was flipping through my Facebook memories this morning and came across a photo I had posted of a bottle of wine. I didn't recognize the counter in the background for a minute. Then it hit me: it was the counter at my rental condo from a year ago, the first place I moved into... Continue Reading →
Piecing the Jigsaw Puzzle of our Last Month
When Bryan and I were in the hospital the month of February last year, I kept everyone updated through Facebook because it was easier to do a mass post than update everyone individually. I also journaled because I knew I wanted to remember everything at some point. As a result, I had a hodge-podge of... Continue Reading →
My Mosaic Life 